How (not) to take a decision

For example you decide to quit smoking. In my case it was because my throat was hurting every morning when I woke up. I had made up my mind, I had no doubt it was the thing to do, but still, I was not so worried about my throat every minute of the day, and suddenly there were exceptions, there were good reasons to forget the resolution and light the cigarette. The problem was not the big decision about quiting, which was obviously right, but the small decisions which had to be faced one after the other, all the time.

Sometimes it is opposite, when you decide you are going start up something difficult which is going to take a long time, and you are quite sure you want to do it. For example, when I decided I would write a novel. I was not sure about the script, nor about myself as a writer, nor about the point of it. It was not easy to think I was getting anywhere, but it was really easy to sit down every day and write. (It was hard to sit down for many hours, anyhow it was a much simpler problem than figuring out if it was worth it.)

So, there is that inner thing which apparently knows always what to do, although it is not always right. It was wrong about the smoking, and it was only when I convinced it, whatever it inner thing is or could be, that I did quite. It was nice about the writing, had good intentions, but I still don't know whether it is right or wrong or just wishful.

That's how (not) to take a decision: you listen to it.


Sorry I write so little lately... I should be listening. I think I am. I'll ask.